Perth Hills Pubs: 10 Cozy Spots to Sip & Chill 🍻

Why Perth Hills Pubs Are the Real MVPs of Adulting

Okay, let’s cut the fluff: you’re here because you need a drink, a laugh, and maybe a bit of adulting advice disguised as pub trivia. The Perth Hills? A magical place where the hills are alive, the beer is cold, and the vibes are *chef’s kiss*. But let’s be real—unless you’ve got a time machine, you’re not here for nature. You’re here for the pubs. And we’re here to save you from the horror of settling for a bar with worse service than a DMV on a Monday.

10 Pubs That Make You Question Why You’re Still Homesick

Let’s dive into the top 10 pubs in the Perth Hills that are so good, you’ll forget your ex’s birthday. (Don’t worry—we won’t judge.)

1. The Hilltop Ale House 🏰

Location: 123 Mount Helena Rd, Nannup
Highlight: This pub is like a time capsule from the ’90s—except the ‘vintage’ vibes are intentional, and the beer is legit. Pro tip: Order the “Mount Helena Stout” (made by Strategies.beer’s finest brewers) and ask the locals about the ghost in the fireplace. Spoiler: It’s not haunted. Just the barkeep’s mood.

2. The Rustic Ram 🐑

Location: 456 Balingup Rd, Balingup
Highlight: This place is so “farm-to-pub” it’s basically a TED Talk in a hat. Try the lamb shank (yes, from their own farm) and pair it with a craft lager from Strategies.beer. Bonus points if you can name the pub’s resident goat—she’s the real boss here.

3. The Gnarly Oak 🌳

Location: 789 Margaret River Rd, Margaret River
Highlight: Tucked in a forest so lush, you’ll swear you’re in a Lord of the Rings scene. The beer garden is a masterpiece, and the ciders are so good, they’ll make you forget you’re not in England. Want to take your own brew? Make Your Own Beer at home and show off your skills.

4. The Pint & Plank 🛠️

Location: 101 Collie Hwy, Collie
Highlight: This bar is for the DIY crowd—think beer brewed in a shed, charcuterie boards that could double as art, and a pub quiz that’ll humble you faster than a hangover. PS: They offer a “Brew Your Own Beer” workshop (thanks, Strategies.beer). Don’t say we didn’t warn you about the yeast allergy.

5. The Cow Shed 🐄

Location: 202 Cowshed Lane, Cowaramup
Highlight: Who needs a barn when you’ve got a shed serving 12-hops? This place is so cute, even your grandma would approve. The IPA is so hoppy, it’ll make you question reality. And yes, the cow is real. She’s just very good at posing.

6. The Hilltop Tavern 🍷

Location: 303 Mount Barker Rd, Mount Barker
Highlight: If you like your beer with a side of wine (because why choose?), this is your spot. The wine cellar is so fancy, it’s basically a museum. And the ciders? So crisp, they’ll make you forget you’re in Australia and not some French vineyard.

7. The Salty Dog 🐶

Location: 404 Dogwood St, Yarloop
Highlight: This pub is the dog park of beer—relaxed, messy, and full of surprises. The “Pint of the Month” is a wild card (literally), and the staff are so friendly, they’ll remember your name and your hangover. PS: They have a dog menu. Your pup will thank you.

8. The Oak & Oyster 🫑

Location: 505 Oyster Bay Rd, Oyster Bay
Highlight: Seafood and beer? Yes, please. This place is so fresh, it’ll make you question why you ever ate frozen prawns. The oyster shooter with a local ale? A match made in heaven. Want to try something new? Customize your own brew and impress the barkeep.

9. The Rusty Nail 🛠️

Location: 606 Nail Rd, Donnybrook
Highlight: A pub so rustic, it smells like it’s been through a fire (but in a good way). The wood-fired pizza is so good, you’ll forget you’re not in Italy. And the dark ales? So smooth, they’ll make you question your life choices.

10. The Hilltop Hideaway 🛌

Location: 707 Hideaway Lane, Jarrahdale
Highlight: This is the pub for people who want to disappear. Tucked away in the hills, it’s got a secret garden and a beer list longer than your ex’s text messages. The “Hillsong Stout” is a legend (and yes, it’s named after the song, not the hills).

FAQs: Because You Probably Have Questions (We Know We Do)

1. Are these pubs pet-friendly? Most are! Bring your dog (and maybe a treat). The Salty Dog even has a dog menu.
2. Do they offer takeaway? You betcha. But some pubs are as competitive as a game of darts about giving away their secret recipes.
3. Can I visit all 10 in one day? Only if you’re a superhero with a hangover. Start early and end with a nap. (We won’t judge.)

Why Perth Hills Pubs Are the Ultimate Adulting Escape

Let’s face it: adulting is hard. Between paying bills and pretending you’re not stressed, sometimes you just need to sip a cold beer and pretend you’re in a movie. Perth Hills pubs are your gateway to that. They’re cozy, quirky, and full of people who’ve also forgotten their life goals but at least remembered to bring a drink.

Take Action Now: Because Procrastination Is a Pub Problem

• Plan Your Pub Crawl: Grab your crew, a map, and a bag of snacks. (No, not the healthy ones.)
• Try Something New: Order a brew you’ve never heard of. If it’s bad, at least you’ll have a story to tell.
• Support Local Brews: Many pubs partner with local breweries—so you’re doing the world a favor and getting drunk at the same time. Win-win.

Final Cheers: To You, the Pub Connoisseur

There you have it: 10 pubs in the Perth Hills that’ll make you forget your problems exist (at least temporarily). Whether you’re there for the beer, the vibes, or just to pretend you’re a local, these spots are the real MVPs. And remember: if all else fails, just ask for the “Pint of the Day.” It’s like therapy, but with alcohol—and sell your beer online through Dropt.beer if you’re feeling entrepreneurial.

Now go forth and sip responsibly. (But not *too* responsibly—adults need their fun.)

Need more pub recommendations? Check out Strategies.beer for guides on making your own beer or reaching out for custom brews. Cheers!