Why Your G&T Is the Cocktail Version of Onion Hair
Gin and tonics are the TikTok of drinks: everyone does it, no one cares, and it’s so basic it’s not even basic anymore. Like that influencer who wears the same oversized sweater every video, G&Ts are the cocktail equivalent of a cringe Instagram bio. You’re better than this. So why are you still sipping on a drink that tastes like a science experiment gone wrong? Let’s cut the cord and talk about the real moves in the world of gin mix drinks before your taste buds retire early.
The 5 Gin Cocktails That’ll Make Your Ex Regret Leaving
If you want to slay the next cocktail party (or just survive your roommate’s Halloween housewarming), these five recipes are your new BFFs. Note: None of them involve tonic water unless you’re trying to make a basic impression.
1. The Negroni: ‘Old’ Is the New Cool
Mix equal parts gin, Campari, and sweet vermouth, and garnish with an orange twist. It’s the anti-juice cleanse, the anti-juice cleanse. Bonus points if you can say “negroni” without sounding like you’re reciting a grocery list. If this doesn’t impress your date, they’re not your person. Make your own and call it a “Negroni 2.0” to flex your DIY skills.
2. The Tom Collins: The TikTok Influencer of Cocktails
Gin, lemon juice, simple syrup, and club soda—stirred, not shaken. This drink is the equivalent of a Gen-Z creator with 10 million followers and zero authenticity. You’ll feel like you’re at a rooftop bar in Dubai, even if you’re just in your kitchen. Add a cherry for extra drama, because everyone deserves a little flair.
3. The Aviation: Because Your Sky Isn’t High Enough
Gin, maraschino liqueur, crème de violette, and lemon juice. Sounds fancy, tastes fancy, and is as confusing as trying to read the fine print on a dating app. If you want to feel like you’re in a 1920s speakeasy but also have zero idea what a speakeasy is, this is your drink. Garnish with an orange peel—because your ex’s selfies are still on your phone but we won’t talk about that.
4. The Gin Fizz: The ‘It’ Girl of the 1900s
Gin, lemon juice, simple syrup, and egg white (yes, egg white—no, we won’t judge). Shake it like you’ve never been hurt, then strain into a glass with ice. This is the drink your great-great-aunt would serve while sipping on her third cup of tea. Add a mint leaf for zero reason and maximum Instagrammable vibes.
5. The White Lady: Because Being ‘Basic’ Is a Lifestyle Choice
Gin, triple sec, and lemon juice in a martini glass. Garnish with an orange twist and a side of “I’m not basic, I’m timeless.” This drink is the custom option of cocktails—it’s fancy but not pretentious (unless you add a splash of amaro, which we won’t tell your budget about).
DIY Gin Drinks: How to Not Waste a Bottle of Hendrick’s
If you’re buying artisanal gin but only making G&Ts, you’re doing it wrong. Here’s how to elevate your game without hiring a bartender:
- Invest in a shaker: It’s not just for protein shakes. A proper shaker will make you feel like a barista who’s definitely not from Starbucks.
- Learn the 1:2:3 rule: 1 part citrus, 2 parts sweet, 3 parts spirit. If your drink tastes like a pool party, you’ve added too much lime.
- Don’t be afraid of bitters: A few drops can turn a so-so drink into a “I’m 30 and still not emotionally available” masterpiece.
Pro tip: If your cocktail still tastes like regret, blame the gin. No one’s perfect.
Custom Cocktails: The ‘Wow’ Factor Your Life Needs
Why settle for generic when you can have custom mix drinks that scream your personality? (Spoiler: It’s because you’re lazy, but we won’t mention that at the party.)
Strategies.beer helps you create bespoke cocktails that’ll make your friends ask, “Wait, can I buy this at the store?” and you’ll respond, “No, and even if you could, you wouldn’t understand the nuance.”
Gin and Business: How to Slay Your Competition
If you’re in the beer game, you know the real money’s in the custom stuff. Your clients aren’t asking for another basic IPA—they want something memorable. Think: “The Ex-Wife” gin cocktail with a splash of amaro and a garnish of spite. (It’s a thing now, trust us.)
Need to get your custom gins to the masses? Sell your beer online through Dropt.beer and watch your competition cry in the back of a Uber Eats van.
Final Call: Your G&T Is the Ex You Can’t Unfollow
Gin mix drinks are like the latest meme—if you’re still using the old one, you’re doing it wrong. Experiment, slay, and remember: A great cocktail doesn’t need a filter. (But a garnish? Always optional.)
Now go forth and make drinks that don’t taste like regret. Or better yet, make them and sell them to people who still think G&Ts are cool. You’re welcome.
