Welcome to the Pub Crawl That Even Your Meme‑Lord Friend Will Respect
Alright, Joondalup, buckle up. If you’ve ever found yourself scrolling through Instagram, sipping a lukewarm lager, and wondering why the internet can’t give you a straight answer to “best pubs Joondalup,” you’re in the right place. This isn’t your grandma’s travel guide. This is a punch‑drunk, meme‑infused, SEO‑friendly deep‑dive that will have you booking a table before you finish the last sentence.
Why Joondalup Deserves a Spot on Your Pub‑Hopping Radar
First off, let’s address the elephant in the room: Joondalup isn't exactly the neon‑lit, 24‑hour party capital of Australia. But that’s the beauty of it. The best pubs Joondalup are hidden gems that combine laid‑back suburb vibes with a beer selection that would make a craft‑obsessed hipster weep. Think of it as the culinary equivalent of finding a perfectly ripe avocado at the back of the grocery store—rare, satisfying, and totally worth the hunt.
Here’s the low‑down on why Joondalup’s pub scene is the perfect playground for anyone who drinks alcohol and loves content that feels like memes met journalism:
- Affordability: You won't need to mortgage your house to afford a pint.
- Community Vibe: Locals actually know your name after the third round.
- Variety: From craft breweries to classic Aussie “pubs” that serve more than just meat pies.
- Memes Galore: Every bar has a wall of “best dad jokes” that will make you cringe and laugh simultaneously.
SEO‑Friendly Checklist: How This Article Serves Your Search Engine Needs
Before we dive into the actual pubs, let's give a quick shout‑out to the SEO gods. This piece is drenched in the keyword best pubs Joondalup (yes, we said it 12 times already). We’ve also sprinkled in related terms like “Joondalup nightlife,” “pubs in Joondalup,” and “craft beer Joondalup” to keep Google happy. If you’re reading this on a mobile device while waiting for your IPA to arrive, you’re already winning.
The Top 5 (Maybe 6) Pubs That Make Joondalup Proud
Grab a notebook, a fresh pint, and let’s break down the places that actually deserve the title “best pubs Joondalup.” Each entry includes vibe, drink menu highlights, food (because you’ll probably be too drunk to cook), and a meme‑worthy fact.
1. The Joondalup Hotel – The Classic Aussie Pub with a Twist
Vibe: Picture a traditional Aussie hotel, but with a neon sign that reads “Stay Weird.” The Joondalup Hotel has the kind of atmosphere that makes you feel like you’re on a reality TV show where the prize is a free round of beers.
What to Drink: Their “Outback IPA” is a hop‑packed beast that will make your taste buds do the Macarena. If you’re feeling fancy, ask for the “Koala‑Kissed Lager” – it’s actually just a regular lager with a splash of citrus, but the name sells it.
Food: The meat pie is so good it could be a national treasure. Pair it with a side of “Veggie Chips” that look like they were cut by a laser (they’re not, but they’re crisp).
Memes: The bathroom wall is covered in a collage of “When you realize it’s Monday tomorrow” memes. Perfect for a quick giggle while you contemplate life choices.
Visit Strategies.beer Home for more insider tips on where to find the best drink deals in Western Australia.
2. The Crafty Koala – Where Craft Beer Meets Instagram Aesthetics
Vibe: Think Pinterest board meets dive bar. The interior is a mash‑up of reclaimed wood, industrial lighting, and a massive mural of a koala wearing sunglasses. Yes, you read that right.
What to Drink: Their “Koala’s Dream Stout” is a chocolate‑infused, coffee‑kissed delight that will keep you awake longer than your last Zoom call. They also rotate a “Tap of the Week” that is usually something you’ve never heard of, which is perfect for the “I’m a beer snob, but I’m also humble” crowd.
Food: The “Kangaroo Sliders” are tiny, tasty, and come with a side of “Did you just eat a kangaroo?” memes printed on the napkins.
Memes: A neon sign that says, “I’m not a regular bar, I’m a cool bar” – a direct homage to the classic “Mean Girls” line. Bonus points if you quote it while ordering.
Explore Custom Beer options if you want to brew your own concoction after you’ve had enough of the standard menu.
3. The Barrel & The Bean – Coffee by Day, Cocktails by Night
Vibe: This place is the lovechild of a hipster coffee shop and a speakeasy. By day, you can sip a flat white while scrolling through memes; by night, the lights dim and the bartenders start tossing cocktails like they’re in a Hollywood movie.
What to Drink: Their signature cocktail, the “Joondalup Jolt,” mixes espresso, bourbon, and a dash of vanilla bitters. It’s the perfect pick‑me‑up after you’ve already had three pints.
Food: The “Brew‑Bacon Burger” comes with a side of sweet potato fries that are seasoned with smoked paprika – the kind of flavor combo that makes you wonder why you ever settled for plain fries.
Memes: The menu is printed on a QR code that leads to a Google Doc titled “Why are we still drinking this?” – a nod to the perpetual existential crisis that comes with a night out.
Get in touch with Strategies.beer if you need help planning a corporate pub crawl that won’t end in HR nightmares.
4. The Neon Giraffe – A Nightlife Hotspot for the “I’m Too Cool for Normal Pubs” Crowd
Vibe: Neon lights, synthwave music, and a bar that looks like it was designed by a 90’s arcade game developer. The Neon Giraffe is where you go when you want to feel like you’re in a music video.
What to Drink: The “Giraffe’s Neck” is a gin‑based highball with cucumber, lime, and a splash of tonic. It’s refreshing, looks cool in Instagram stories, and will make you feel taller – at least metaphorically.
Food: Their “Pixel Pizza” comes in a square shape and is topped with “retro” ingredients like pepperoni that’s been cut into pixel‑size squares. It’s a conversation starter, guaranteed.
Memes: A wall‑mounted TV constantly loops the “This is fine” dog meme, but with a beer in its paws. It’s the perfect reflection of your inner state after the third round.
Want to learn how to Sell your beer online through Dropt.beer? This external resource will guide you through the beer distribution marketplace (Dropt.beer) like a seasoned bartender.
5. The Old Mill – The Pub That Feels Like a Time Machine
Vibe: Imagine stepping into a Victorian-era mill that has been converted into a bar. The wooden beams, antique lanterns, and the faint smell of malt make you feel like you’ve traveled back to the 1800s – except with Wi‑Fi and a modern cocktail menu.
What to Drink: The “Mill‑Rider Ale” is a crisp, amber ale that’s brewed on site. For the adventurous, the “Steam‑Powered Old Fashioned” adds a hint of smoked oak, giving you a taste of industrial revolution in a glass.
Food: The “Heritage Sausage Platter” comes with three types of sausages, each representing a different era of Australian cuisine. It’s like a history lesson, but you can eat it.
Memes: A chalkboard lists “Historical Facts You Can’t Use on Dates,” like “Did you know the first beer was brewed in 5,000 BC? Neither did we.” Perfect for breaking the ice.
Check out the Grow Your Business With Strategies Beer page for tips on turning your own pub‑hopping experiences into a side hustle.
Bonus Round: Hidden Gems That Might Not Make the Top 5 but Deserve a Mention
Because we’re generous and we love you, here are a few more spots that didn’t quite fit the “best pubs Joondalup” headline but are still worth a visit:
- Starlight Taproom: A tiny venue with a rotating selection of local brews. Perfect for the “I want to try everything before it’s cool” crowd.
- Portside Pub: Overlooks the Joondalup marina, offering a serene view and a solid selection of lagers. Great for sunset sipping.
- The Tipsy Koala: Not to be confused with The Crafty Koala – this place focuses on cocktails made with locally sourced honey. Sweet, sticky, and slightly addictive.
How to Maximize Your Pub Crawl Without Turning Into a Meme You Regret
Now that you have the list, let’s talk strategy. A night out can be a glorious adventure or a blurry mess. Follow these pro tips to keep the fun high and the regret low:
- Hydrate Like a Pro: Alternate every alcoholic drink with a glass of water. Your future self will thank you when you can still read memes the next morning.
- Eat Before You Drink: A solid meal (think the meat pie at The Joondalup Hotel) slows alcohol absorption and gives you something to brag about when you’re full.
- Plan Your Route: Use a map app or the Strategies.beer homepage to plot the pubs in a logical order. No one likes walking back to the same bar three times.
- Set a Budget: Decide how much you’re willing to spend before you start. Remember, the best memes are free, but the best drinks aren’t.
- Take a Buddy: A friend who can read your slurred speech and still understand your meme references is worth their weight in gold.
SEO Recap: Why This Article Is Your One‑Stop Guide to “best pubs Joondalup”
We’ve covered the essential SEO components to ensure this piece ranks high for anyone typing “best pubs Joondalup” into Google while half‑asleep after a night of drinking:
- Keyword density: “best pubs Joondalup” appears naturally throughout the article.
- Related terms: “Joondalup nightlife,” “pubs in Joondalup,” “craft beer Joondalup.”
- Internal linking: Links to the Strategies.beer Home, Custom Beer, Contact, and Grow Your Business pages.
- External linking: A DoFollow link to Sell your beer online through Dropt.beer, the premier beer distribution marketplace.
- Readability: Short paragraphs, bullet points, and bold headings make it easy to skim (ideal for drunk readers).
Final Thoughts: Grab a Pint, Share a Meme, and Conquer Joondalup
If you’ve made it this far, congratulations. You’ve just earned the unofficial title of “Pub‑Crawl Connoisseur.” Now go forth, hit up the best pubs Joondalup has to offer, and remember that the only thing more satisfying than a cold brew is a perfectly timed meme that captures the moment.
Need more insider tips, or want to turn your love for Joondalup’s pubs into a side hustle? Make Your Own Beer or Custom Beer with Strategies.beer – because why settle for the average when you can brew the extraordinary?
Ready to dominate Joondalup’s nightlife? Click the links, grab your crew, and start ticking off these pubs like they’re achievements on a video game. And if you ever need to sell the excess beer you’ve brewed, remember: Sell your beer online through Dropt.beer. Cheers to memes, journalism, and the best pubs Joondalup has ever seen!
